Liberty Maven

This nifty short play is a reaction to the pending health care reform efforts being pushed by our lawmakers. Sometimes you reach a point when laughing is all you can do because it “hurts” less.

This was submitted to us by author, Clyde James Aragon. He writes:

THE HEALTH REFORM PLAN TOWN HALL MEETING – THE NON-MUSICAL is a ten-minute comedy play about the health care ‘reform’ bill and is a humorous way of looking at a very scary situation. Curious, but informed citizens, meet at a town hall meeting to ask questions of their representatives on Health Care Reform.

This play is being distributed free of charge and the author, Clyde James Aragon, only asks that should it be performed, no admission be charged and that the author be given credit as having written it.

The author is an Albuquerque, New Mexico humor writer and can be reached at bookhumor@yahoo.com

You may also download the PDF here for printing out and potentially performing it at your next Tea Party event.

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THE HEALTH REFORM PLAN TOWN HALL MEETING
- THE NON-MUSICAL -

a one-act play by © Clyde James Aragon

CAST OF CHARACTERS:

REPRESENTATIVE BULLHORN
REPRESENTATIVE FLOWMASTER
CITIZEN #1
CITIZEN #2
CITIZEN #3
CITIZEN #4

COMEDY: 10 pages. 6 characters to be played by: 3 men; 3 woman.

SYNOPSIS: Curious, but informed citizens, meet at a town hall meeting to ask questions of their representatives on Health Care Reform. This is a ten-minute comedy play about the health care ‘reform’ bill and is a humorous way of looking at a very scary situation.

PROPS: 6 folding chairs

* * * This play is being distributed free of charge and the author, Clyde James Aragon, only asks that should it be performed, no admission be charged and that the author be given credit as having written it. * * *

**************

THE HEALTH REFORM PLAN TOWN HALL MEETING
- THE NON-MUSICAL -

a one-act play by Clyde James Aragon

(on a bare stage, two politicians, seated in folding chairs, face four citizens intent on asking the politicians questions on their health reform plan)

CITIZEN #4 (addressing the audience and then sitting down): The other day there was a town hall meeting in Montana over the new health reform bill which was presented by House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and passed by the House of Representatives. The public was invited and allowed to ask questions of the two members of the House of Representatives, Representative Bullhorn and Flowmaster, who showed up. Many things were said and, after adjourning quietly after three hours of questioning, these excerpts were extracted from the minutes of that meeting:

CITIZEN #1 (raising hand and then speaking): Representative Bullhorn, the new House health care plan is almost 2,000-pages long. How do you expect anyone to read it, let alone understand it?

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In many re-branding efforts a new mission statement is derived. My choice for a re-branded GOP: The Free Country Project. The mission could also be worded in this way, “Do the polar opposite of whatever Lindsey Graham suggests.”

I apologize to the wonderful Free State Project for bastardizing their efforts with such a suggestion, but I am quite serious. Instead of putting energy into calling the Obama administration socialists why not abandon the petty, kindergarten-style, partisan bickering and look within? Come up with a new 1994-style “Contract With America” but this time don’t renege on the contract. It should not be called anything similar to “Contract With America” though. Yes, that bad taste is still lingering.

Dubbing it “The Free Country Project” and making more than a half-assed effort to bring libertarianism back into the GOP could be a winning formula. Of course, many will have to tuck their neo-con tails between their legs and embrace Ron Paul and his libertarian friends. I’m not talking about a macho homophobic half-hearted embrace here. I’m talking about a full-on bear hug that will make gawkers worry about dropping the soap in the GOP country club shower.

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During Ron Paul’s alloted 5 minutes to question Secretary of State Hillary Clinton regarding foreign policy Clinton took the opportunity to heap praise on Ron Paul and his enthusiastic supporters during the Presidential campaign following her answer.

It was a rather classy move by Clinton I must say. We even got to hear here infamous cackle when the chair of the committee said following her remarks, “Now your going to encourage them!”

Check out the lovefest below which also includes Ron Paul’s full question.

Here is yet another fun video from a Ron Paul supporter. The creator mashes up a segment of South Park to great effect. Hilarious.

Watch for the Ron Paul blimp cameo.

I admit it. I really think Sacha Baron Cohen is funny. I also think Ron Paul is the most honest, down-to-earth, and forthright politician of my lifetime. Upon learning that Ron Paul would be appearing in Cohen’s upcoming “Bruno” movie my immediate reaction was “Uh-oh.”

Cohen’s take-no-prisoners approach to comedy is fine as long as you aren’t the one being duped. He’s duped some of the more popular modern politicians, journalists, and celebrities. His punked list includes Pat Buchanan, Newt Gingrich, Bob Barr, C. Everett Koop, Donald Trump, John McCain, Noam Chomsky, Ralph Nader, Andy Rooney, and now Ron Paul.

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On the slightly lighter side…

Adding to all of the beyond ridiculus Obama coins, dolls, buttons, underwear, halos and toast comes Obama Fingers. No, you won’t be able to put batteries in them and massage your back to the self-enriching sounds of Obama’s “Yes we can!” voice in your ears. These fingers taste like chicken.

Photo: AP

From the Guardian UK:

A company in German(sic) has just introduced a line of snacks called “Obama Fingers”: frozen chicken fingers with curry dip. To Americans, marketing a fried chicken dish with the name of our first African-American president instantly tingles our sensitivity to racial stereotyping and racist imagery.

The author prattles on about the apparent racism in such a move. Then asks if it is racist if the company putting out the product claims it was ignorant of such stereotypes?

It’s only “racist” to someone who looks at them and thinks… “oh lord, that is racist!” I look at them and see the chicken fingers are breaded and fried, and come with a curry dip. I then think… mmm yummy. Then I think, what an incredibly stupid name for a food product.

I can certainly see how someone may be offended by Obama Fingers, but don’t we have more to be worried about than whether or not a German company puts out a product that may or may not be offensive?

Obama took office and immediately began waving around his huge stimulus package. “It is really inappropriate behavior–way too big”, said Ron Paul, Republican Congressman from Texas.

The Democrats in the House adored Obama’s package. Only 12 Democrats shunned the package. Not a single Republican was turned on by it.

Obama then exposed it to the Senate. He met privately with Republican Senators to show it off. They came away unimpressed.

Republicans chose a leader to show off a package of their own. Even though they complained it was too big, they revealed an even larger package.

Meanwhile, the citizens of America are starting to get worried. And for good reason.

It seems that the longer the debate goes on the bigger the package will be. And they know that the bigger the package the more it’s going to hurt.

Wait… are we still talking about the economy?

No matter, the people always get screwed in the end.

Hmm… that last bit didn’t come out quite right either. I think I’ll just stop typing.

About a year ago a video was released that I thought was one of the very best of the Ron Paul grassroots effort. No it wasn’t one of my own. Mine are obviously quite amateur in comparison.

This video really summed up the Ron Paul campaign in my view. The video’s theme is now more relevant than ever due to the financial crisis and the Federal Reserve’s insistence on printing money to combat the crisis.

So on the first day of 2009 let us look back a year and see one of the better videos from Ron Paul’s autonomous mini-revolution of grassroots supporters.

Today, Christmas Eve, I am pondering two humorous quotes for different reasons. Both are from Jack Handey of Saturday Night Live and “Deep Thoughts”.

The first is about children. I have a five-year-old daughter and a three-year-old son. As I ponder the future potential for economic calamity with worry I also witness very small moments of pure joy at their excitement over Christmas. It makes me realize that I will do anything for them because I cannot feel a more stronger love than I feel for them. Children are imperfect liberty seekers, but seek it they do every single day. Jack Handey said it best when he wrote:

“The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.”

The second quote is a dedication to the exiting Bush administration and every single U.S. President who believed in an interventionist foreign policy. Also, anyone in a position of power who is a proponent of the oxymoron: Peace through war. Again, these are Jack Handey’s words:

“I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they’d never expect it.”

Merry Christmas and keep your liberty fire burning through 2009 and beyond.

The FDA has come up with a solution to solve America’s Social Security funding problem and they may or may not be aware of it. Oddly, they propose using Medicare funds to help with the problem. What could I possibly mean by this?

Well, I admit it is something from my own rather morbid and twisted mind. To understand what I’m talking about let us take a journey together.

Below is a picture of a new medical device approved by the FDA. Doctor’s are now permitted to prescribe its use by elderly and disabled patients. Not only that, but since it is a medical device it can be paid for with Medicare funds.

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